Thursday, October 07, 2004

Tired of Being Polite and Politically Correct

Yep, my other blog could be seen that way. Certainly. A modern day Pollyanna. Except that Pollyanna gets BORING. And, when Pollyanna gets boring there is a little "bad" angel on my shoulder who just loves to pop up and shoot her mouth off.

I admit it. I know, it's not cool to do so, but I am truly tired of being politically correct all the time. Yes, I publish an ezine for at-home-moms and attempt to look like June Cleaver of the new millenium. I am a good mom, devoted wife, and I'm pretty open-minded, at least I like to think so. I'm also a human being with an occasional mean streak.

I whole-heartedly detest ignorance (although have been guilty of it myself, I never claimed to be perfect). I cannot stand people who trip around aimlessly online, filling out forms, joining safelists, subscribing to ezines, request more information and then complain that they are being spammed.

I recently went a few rounds with a gentleman (I'll use the term LIGHTLY here) who filled out a form that linked to my auto responder. I had his IP address and the time stamp for when he filled out the form. He, in turn, received 4 letters (over the course of 2 weeks) and decided he was being spammed. But instead of just removing himself, he wrote me (with some serious misspelled words and grammar worse than my 10 year old) and proceeded to give me the electronic version of a severe tongue lashing.

I attempted to set him straight. Only to have him write to me (in all CAPS) with multiple exclamation points telling me what kind of person I am.

To satisfy your curiosity, yes, I was called several colorful names. The thing that really cracked me up was that this guy's email address was godsannointed2004. He was your typical internet psycho-coward who loved hiding behind his monitor and saying all the things he didn't have the... er... guts to say in real life.

I made sure to tell him how much he amused me. Even through my irritation I was laughing, the laugh of someone slightly off-kilter, but a laugh nonetheless.

He kept emailing - spiraling himself into a black hole of venemous anger spread with mind-numbing stupidity the likes of which just HAD to give him a seizure. I pictured him gnawing through his tongue and bottom lip, hair sticking out every which way, foaming at the mouth with cujo-like insanity. And that little stinker on my shoulder popped up and said... "hey... let's see what we can do to make this guy implode..."

I don't even have the audacity to confess here the depths to which I sunk telling this guy what I thought of him. Although, suffice it to say it contained references to "COPS" (yes, the television show) "Trailers (mobile homes)" and "his lacking appropriately sized anatomical parts that rendered him only capable of attacking women with evidence of intelligence greater than his - which meant that a woman with the IQ of a toaster would be a threat."

And, he imploded. Over and over and over again... with foul language mixed with, I kid you not, quotes from the bible. Apparently, you can get away with swearing as long as you thump your bible at the same time.

I did not know that.

Finally, I just replied with something like:

The person you are attempting to reach
has installed software that is now blocking
your email address.

Your emails are no longer reaching the
addressee's inbox.

Have a nice day!
THANK YOU JESUS GOD IS SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And, the little bad angel jumped up and said... DO IT AGAIN! So I did. Pasted the same exactly text and sent it off in response to his gratitude.

He wrote back AGAIN:
how many times do I need to say Thank you

I couldn't believe it. Then I realized that it was just SO sad I couldn't
even be irritated anymore.

Then I kicked myself for even getting caught up in it. Yes, I am a bigger person that that. On a typical day I have more compassion and tolerance. Honest, I swear this is true.

But, when you've been up all night with an infant and tangle all morning with a 9 and 12 year old - you start to get a little bit cranky.

No excuses. I behaved... inappropriately.

And, even so, I still believe there are some people who just shouldn't be allowed access to computers.

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